How to deal with IVF failure

Dealing with IVF failure

In vitro fertilisation is a medical word that most people are now quite familiar with. This is a blanket term used to cover a number of infertility treatments options offered by various fertility clinics. The actual IVF procedure will depend on the specific problem the couple are facing.

Before the actual IVF implantation the doctor will prescribe some medication and practices to prepare for the actual IVF procedure. Some patients expect success on the first IVF cycle itself. There is no harm in hoping as the general success rate is 33% for the first IVF cycle. However, you need to also brace yourself for IVF failure. If you are not among the 33% of successful patients do not lose heart, IVF failure during the first IVF cycle is not the end of the world. Most patients find that they are successful after 2 or 3 failed IVF cycles.

During each IVF cycle it is good to be positive and hopeful. However couples need to be prepared to try the IVF cycle a number of times before they can successfully get pregnant. In most cases failure is expected and couples have to take this IVF failure as a part of their IVF treatment.

Coping with failed IVF

Dealing with IVF failure can be really tough. No two individuals react in the same way and the disappointment is very deep rooted. Sometimes couples are not even able to console each other as they each respond to the failure in their own individual manner.

Some general tips for dealing with IVF failure which has helped many couples are:

Be realistic: One IVF failure or even a couple of failed cycles is not the end. Very few couples see success in the first try. Many couples have IVF implantation success after 8 or 9 attempts. As long as your doctor is hopeful, you should stay positive. You can try again or consider alternate options suggested by the doctor.

Look after yourself: Many women in their despair tend to ignore themselves. They let themselves go and this only makes the situation worse. When you look in the mirror you feel awful about the way you look and it also serves as a constant reminder of what you have just gone through. Take care of the way you look to feel good about yourself.

Allow yourself to heal: Give yourself time to heal from the IVF failure. Failure is the most difficult thing to deal with for any person, but in most instances time is the best healer.

Do not blame yourself: IVF failure is not your fault, so do not blame yourself. Even if you did something that you feel might have caused the procedure to fail, you cannot blame yourself. Beating yourself up in regret does not change anything. If you feel you might have become pregnant but something you did caused the procedure to fail then the chances of your success during the next cycle is quite high.

Indulge yourself: Take time to go out and indulge in some activity that you enjoy. Do something that makes you feel good. Take a short trip, a romantic weekend, a visit to the mountains or a trip to the seaside. If going out of town is not an option try a day at the spa or the beauty parlour. This is sure to perk you up.

Whatever you do, avoid letting despondency set in. Keep a positive attitude and keep trying. If the doctor suggests that it is not worth trying the IVF cycle again, then look at alternate options. Consult with your doctor for the other choices that are available to you.

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